One day a mum took her two adopted daughters and myself out shopping. Her youngest daughter who is 6 year old suddenly asked her mum “What if I will be unable to find my birth mother and cry, what will I do?
Mum replied “Baby, of course it doesn’t matter if you cry, you have the right to cry, because you have had a catastrophic event , even if your memory isn’t that clear on what happened, but this thing is large enough to affect your life.
The young girl said said “ If I cry hard no one will be able to comfort me.”
“That means you need to have a cry at that moment. I will always love and support you. It is good sometimes to vent out your emotions by crying.
“What if no one will like me anymore?”
“Of course not ! I will always love you and so will your sister, but you have to understand that some people will not understand why you are crying because they have never stood in your shoes.”
The six year old continued to ask more questions.
“You will be ugly” , I replied to the girl after she asked “What if I cry forever?” Her mum and I smiled as we joked that she will become ugly if she cries forever.
I recorded to myself the full love of that moment. The mother told us that mothers normally have a full understanding of the answer.
The older sister once told me , “ I do not know what to do , who to tell that I have been crying. I feel as like my life seems to be empty.”
As a child or adult you have the right to cry and you should cry. Because no one other than you knows what it exactly feels like, people can imagine but not fully understand the way you feel.
This moment in your life has been stored in your subconscious, which has caused a lifetime of a shadow that only you can see.
Why should we not cry?